In my last post about ending a relationship we talked about doing some real soul searching before taking any action and how to take such an action the right way.Today I discided to talk about how to stop your divorce.Iwanted to deal with this specificaly because it is not just a dating relationship there are many factors that makes this worth writing about which you will learn very soon.How ever it is worth reading the last post because you will pick up points that I have not mension in this post now lets get started.Its easy to get scared of the prospect of being alone, especially when youve been with someone for a long time. Just make sure that that is not the reason you want to stay married. Its not a good reason.
If you find that you really do want to save your marriage for the right reasons than you have got options. Here are some things you can do, or not do, to help save your marriage:
1. First things first, assuming that your partner isnt just a jackass, but has been a loving partner to you and has just gotten to the point where they dont see a future between the two of you, take some time to evaluate how you and your marriage have changed since the two of you have been together.
Its sad but true that we often drift apart from each but it happens so slowly we dont even realize it. Try to compare where the two of you are now in your relationship as opposed to where you used to be. Now dont be unrealistic. People change and so do relationships, you cant expect to feel exactly the same way together as you did when you were twenty. Thats unrealistic. But that doesnt mean that as the two of you have changed and grown that your marriage cant change and grow and stay strong too. Has it? Or have the two of you gone your separate ways without even realizing it?
2. After youve given that some thought and hopefully come up with some ideas, talk to your spouse. I mean really talk, talk like you probably havent talked to each other in years. Openly, honestly without anger and resentment. Dont accuse, just suggest. Tell them what you think and ask them what they think. Even though you are both coming at it from different angles, you might just find that you are both on the same page. Talking will help you find out.
3. One of the best things the two of you can do is to find a counselor who can guide you down this path. The two of you have probably had years of poor communication skills and bad habits, its going to be hard to break those bad habits alone. A counselor can help. A counselor can also act as referee if things start to get a little too heated. If you really want to save your marriage this is usually the best way to go about it.
What you will learn by trying to stop your divorce might just make your marriage even better than it has ever been.You will learn along the way that Communication is the vital key to any relationship.That is talking and listerning to one another.Also finding somebody you both can trust to help direct you through the difficult paths.By just doing that you might have a second chance of making things work out in your favour.
By trying to stop your divorce you just might make your marriage better than its been in a long time, or maybe better than its ever been. Just talk to one another, and more importantly, listen to one another. Find someone who can help you navigate this difficult path, and youll have a very good chance of making things work out just the way you want.Just remember pleading, beging and promises to make changes will not work.
Good Luck
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